So now I'm being yelled at for eating again. Whattahell? The princess, young miss, should be allowed to keep everything I can't not eat laying around and if I touch it it's not enough with having to feel like shit because I'm gonna get fat, the stress around trying to at least not purge this time, because there should be more healthy ways to get rid of 500 excess kcal (which is all you ever get rid of anyways, even if you're at it all night), such as going on the walking trip tomorrow. But so anyways, in the words of F, what the actual fuck. Its not like I want to. Its not like I enjoy it. Its not like its something I plan and could just refrain from, if I could I very much would.
And then she tells my father... that I like even less. Unneccessary comments about how I ate a whole jar of jam last week.
Sorry for only talking about eating stuff. It's just what I do when I'm down.
I can't sleep now, either. And I have scratches in random places. Just missing alcoholism, and a gambling addiction.
I can't sleep when I'm alone.
I'm so fucked up, I shouldn't have people around me, but somehow it feels like that's the only way I can be fixed. To have people who care, who know, who get it. Who at least try to.
Because there needs to be more fun moments than miserable moments.
x
/E
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