Anything for you

I feel like I've become a housewive. The past week or so I've been cooking, cleaning, organizing, driving, going to the gym... I feel so run down. It's been really mentally tiring to keep a smile on my face while striving to get the attention of the man of the house - if you can call him that, he's more of an overgrown 14 year old girl - the only way I know how, which is cooking.

So that asshole has been going on and on about his amazing "friends" who apparently deserve to be admired for working the runway and/or pole dancing (which is, according to him, not as easy as you'd think), and have absolutely no future because they base their lifestyle on rich men paying for them, while I've been wondering whether I should stop pointing out how pathetic they are and start ignoring him instead.

It's just so frustrating. He makes it sound like these people are so amazing even though they haven't accomplished anything at all and if I point it out I'm "being paranoid". It's like, if I'd drop out of school and start sleeping with rich old men/modeling(lol yeah right)/stripping/becoming a fucking porn star, that would be just as awesome, if not better, than winning the fucking nobel price in physics.

Maybe I will.

Fuck, maybe I should get a job at a "gentlemens club" next summer. He's been going on enough about how some guy he knows almost became a bartender there.

Normally I try to keep calm but today when he was saying how some well-off idiot got a BMW for his 18th birthday, I was like: "Well where is my BMW?" and he kind of stared at me in shock.

My point is, I don't know what he wants.

For me to grow up and be like them? Absolutely not.

For me to be impressed? He denies it.

He's just too amazed to shut up about it and has no one else to talk to? Partially.

He wants to piss me off? That's what he said today.

He wants attention? Yeah, that's it.

So from now on when he talks about any of these little sluts (yes I call them sluts even though they're boys) I just glace my eyes and look away.

x

/E