Special

"The more you think, the less you dream"

To me, there are 2 aspects to knowing someone. The first one is knowing things about the person, like where they go to school, what sports they play, what music they listen to. This stuff is pretty shallow, you don't even need to find it out from the person directly, but it's somehow necessary as a base for a friendship. The other aspect is knowing how people react in different situations, knowing their sense of humor and how to connect with them. For this, you really need to be around someone. I've found that I've often gotten to know people over chat or sms and when time comes when we know all the material things about eachother, it really doesn't get any further. But still, you don't want to be too pushy when you're just getting to know someone.

With me, it can sometimes seem like I don't like people I actually don't mind, because when I'm shy I tend to act in a way that can be interpreted as superiour. One sure way of knowing if I like someone is whether I touch them or not. Like, hugs, jokingly bumping into them, stroking my arm across someones shoulders when I walk by.. just getting into peoples personal space, it's a way to bond somehow. On the other hand, if I feel like someone I'm not too fond of stands too close, it can really piss me off. I don't like it when people are loud and rude, especially not if they casually touch me. I once met a girl who talked to me loudly, stood too close and held on to my necklace asking about it. I can get bothered if someone I know well does this, but then it's in a flattered way, with someone I havn't met before or havn't become friends with yet, I find it highly annoying and almost insulting. I'm gona stop now before mentioning any names.

So I just played a game, and we won seventy-something to fourty-something, so I'm quite happy about that. I fucked up my foot a little in the first quarter and it's hurting a little now, even though I was able to run on it for the rest of the game. Thats my general attitude though: Suck it up. Hurts? Tough luck. I admire people who adapt that way of thinking.

Talking about people I admire, today I lead a discussion in german, and part of my theme was abstinence. A girl said that there is no way you should wait with sex until marridge - what if you and your husband don't "match" sexually? - and then this boy said something in the means of baing able to imagine waiting until marridge. I thought it was really cute of him. But then again, what ever happened to men? I mean, they're supposed to be sex crazed, and now all I hear from boys is "it should be special". Of cause, for some, that can be interpreted as ".. take my virginity in the bathroom at skicamp". No comment ;)

x
/E