The past again

I went on Rs old blog. He started it for me and locked it so only I could read it. I thought he'd deleted it...

I just read fragments of how we were so happy and then gradually fell apart.

25th of June 2009:

I don't just say the words "I love you" to achieve your satisfactory, I'm being serious.
I don't mind you being paranoid, or checking my mobile, or whatever... <3

8th of August 2009:

I realized that I cant imagine normal life without you, as in holiday, where I had the constant feeling of something missing, and now during school, where Im always happy to see you.

26th of October 2009:

You deserve to be bright as the sunrise you brought to my life,
now I should be bringing it back to you.

Do I know how to? No.

I can't believe that already after half a year of being together we weren't okay.

It kept going in that direction... He wanted to make me happy but couldn't.

The reason why I'm coming back to him is only really to show how people who care about me that much can't be around me after a certain point because nobody can make me better. I'm saying this as if I'm clear about it and don't blame anyone, though really I have moments where I scream at people that it's their fault, beg them to help me and then turn away and say they don't understand. You can't love someone like that, it hurts. Just like it hurt him. And I have to distance myself from people who care because we never really accept failure without an excuse.

x

/E